GloomySaturday

Today is Saturday. But it is not one of those lazy , gajebo , bizzare Saturdays. I did some unexpected things that i didn't even plan out. I'm going to tell you guys about what i have been through all the way until now. I started this morning with family prayer as usual. It was ngantukin. In the noon, i wanted to get a haircut. A cutting edge and fierce haircut. I asked my mom for some money then i walked to the barbershop. i was sweating like hell and i could really feel the sweat was falling like a raindrop. I bet the guy who cut my hair would feel disgusted. I wanted the haircut that i have posted in the previous post. He didn't get the instructions i said. I FUCKING HATE MY FUCKING HAIRCUT. The more i try to embrace, the more i feel fucking awful. I was so pissed off.

The day continued and i still disliked the haircut. I looked like a complete-shitfaced idiot with big bone-head. Believe me, i didn't even bother to look at the mirror. I had a lunch and played computer. My sisters annoyed me with their uber disturbing noises. I couldn't contain it. I blew up. I shouted to them. I knew it was terrible. But i just couldn't handle it. I had a headache. i didn't want the things got any worse. I decided to go to bed and took a nap. I cried. I teared up with no particular reason. My eyebag was getting bigger. ONLY GOD KNOWS WHY ON EARTH I TEARED UP. I feel awful for blowing up on Deandra. I meant she was blameless. So i took a courage to apologize. She smiled and shook my hand then i kissed her. Problem is settled.

SORENYA, I bought a black converse. It was affordably cheap. I LOVE IT :)

That was all. I just couldn't be more grateful. *Geez, I am so broke right now*

Quote of The Day

" You just gotta believe in yourself that what's inside is worth more than their breaking words and mocks. Stay true to who you are and always have faith. "

drought

i know i am socially retarded. I have insignificant achievements and not exactly make my parents proud as i should be doing. I am a mess. i have done some horrible things that are little bit outrageous. Yet i am an asshole. I can't be the normal cool dude in my age who's now more than able to do some "man" stuff. I am superficially dumb at socializing with other. My fear has taken over my nerves and i turn to become an antisocial-freak whom barely has friends. My awareness are painful and unnecessary. I act so weird to surroundings. I am not a kind of happy-go-lucky-cheerful-sweet type of person.

It seems like people will never ever get it. They constantly tell me what to do. It gets frustrating sometimes. You want to make them happy but in the other side, i want to be happy for thing that i do.

BANDOENG :D